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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

I'm just talking here, we're just talking here...

Friday was my day off.  It was also Good Friday, so lots of people had the day off, but it was my normal, every-other-Friday-day-off.  I'd planned to do nothing but snuggle with Parker (read: chase after Parker, begging her to snuggle with me) and read my latest book (The Twelve by Justin Cronin). 

So when Awesome asked me to go car shopping with him on Friday, my day changed entirely.  I've car shopped before.  I brought my current Nissan Altima a few years ago, right after law school.   And it was a terrible, stressful experience.  I started looking before school got out my third year of law school.  My friend Nathan and I test drove some vehicles in Oxford.  Some people like car shopping; I do not.  I hated it.  I had severe stress about driving a vehicle that wasn't mine, and worrying about getting into a wreck or not driving carefully enough.  Making such a huge purchase gave me nightmares and I was scared I'd make the wrong decision.  I even tried to get Nathan to test drive the cars for me.  I also had no idea what to look for, what to ask the salesperson about, and how to negotiate cost.  Prior to this, my experience with automobile sales involved heading down the street to Killens Chevrolet in Newton and checking with Mr. Mark or Mrs. Jan.  If I ever buy another vehicle, I'm heading back down there.  I'm serious. 

After a while of driving vehicles and not knowing anything about any vehicle, I pretty much gave up that summer.  I didn't know what I wanted or what I didn't want, what color, what type anything.  I knew I wanted a sunroof and heated seats.  Thats the extent of my concern. 

A few weeks later, while in Jackson studying for the bar exam, I spent the night with the Lodens.  That night I was telling them about my car troubles, and Jeremy, who is literally the most patient person I know (for putting up with his wife's crazy college friend who randomly comes by a lot!), says that he was doing a commercial for a car lot at work that day and he saw a car I might be interested in.  A 2006 red Altima.  So the next day, Karen and I checked it out.  I drove around the block one time (my nervousness about test driving a vehicle was ramped up 10x since I was now driving in the middle of Jackson) and bought the car.  I hope to NEVER have to go through that experience again.  Or I hope that, when I do, someone will take pity on me and find me a vehicle themselves. 

I'm TERRIBLE with cars.  Like, really, really, really bad.  I can barely remember what color car someone drives and determining the make and model is beyond me.  Like, I'm not even sure the difference between a make and a model.  ??? I don't know?  Why are their two?  Does one mean the year it was made?  Why don't they say that?  Its one of my friends favorite games to play, "Jessica, what kind of car does your sister Betsy drive?" "Um, a light colored, maybe champagne, or gold, like shiny, small car.  Like a Lexus? Or maybe a Mazda?  Its like a regular car, not a big car.  A Lexus?  But its not new.  Its a few years old. Yes, maybe a Totoya Lexus.  That is my final answer." 

Wrong.  Mazda. 

"What kind of car does Shannon drive?"  "A gold car with a sunroof?  An Altima? I don't know.  Maybe a Mazda or a Dodge?  I'm not sure." 

Even writing this, I can see Shannon's law school car in my mind and do not know what type it is at all.  So on the way to look for a new vehicle for Awesome, we played this game with our friends in Cleveland.  I was able to correctly name only one of the Gang's vehicles, Laura Beth's.  Why?  Because she has a Jeep Cherokee, which was the type I had before the Altima.  And I LOVED it!  Hers is white, though, and I failed to even come close to what year it might be.  I didn't correctly guess anyone else's beyond "Marshall drives, like an SUV? A dark color." or "Will has a big truck.  That's new. "  The closest I came was to Meghanns- I correctly guessed both kind (SUV) and the color (blue).  The same car I park next to every single day.  Still don't know what type of SUV it is. 

On the way, I asked Awesome what he was looking for in a vehicle.  Like me, he felt it was important to have a lot of cup holders and a sunroof would be awesome.  Unlike me, he had actually put thought into this and wanted a large backseat that folded down and some fancy engine or something stuff.  I don't know. I asked him about colors and he said he didn't really care for that champagne color, but other than that, he didn't care. 

We headed down to Greenville where we met probably the worst car salesman in the Delta.  Richard.  Richard was wearing a navy, orange and white shell necklace to match his orange polo shirt and navy windbreaker.  Beyond his fashion savvy, he failed to sell a vehicle or even convince us to go a test drive, despite Awesome's interest in a 2011 Rav-4. 

(Blogger's Note:  Don't be too impressed with my knowledge of the vehicles we looked at Friday.  On the way home, I quizzed Awesome, knowing, at some point, someone would ask me what type of vehicle Josh looked at or bought.  And I wanted to be prepared.)

Down the road, we met DeWitt.  DeWitt allowed us to test drive the car, and then ordered us to pull over in a scenic parking lot beside a nice dumpster so we could look under the hood.  It crossed my mind that he might be a serial killer, but ultimately, we just "talked" with DeWitt and decided not to pursue the 2011 Equinox. 

Feeling unfulfilled, we headed back to Cleveland, without a new vehicle, but with vague promises to get in touch with DeWitt when Awesome was ready.  On the way back, we discussed more car-related stuff.  I'm not sure when it happened, but at some point, Shelia (the name for Awesome's truck), decided she was sick of hearing about being traded in for a newer model and she decided to show us a thing or to.  She got overheated and the engine started smoking. 

Awesome and I handle things differently.  I would have 1. Probably not noticed. 2. When I did notice, keep driving.  3.  Call my dad and ask him what to do.  4. If he didn't answer, call one of my guy friends and ask them what to do. 5.  Gotten to Cleveland and driven up to some garage and asked them what to do. 

Instead, Awesome coasted into the gas station in Shaw where he bought some fancy bottled water and poured it into some little open cap under the hood.  Then we went across the street and bought some more water and some oil and poured those into their respective open caps.  And when I say we, I mean him.  I stood there laughing and taking pictures for the benefit of my readers:






Eventually Shelia was finished with her water drinking and we decided it was safe to get back on the road.  Which is a good thing, I'm not sure how long we would have lasted hanging out in Shaw without a vehicle. 

We got to Cleveland and coasted into Kossman's Motors where we were just going to "look".  We walked around for a minute, and I went back to the car to get an umbrella since it started raining.  In the time I was gone, Awesome had decided to buy a car!  It was a car just like the one we test drove in Greenville, but less miles, a sunroof and navigation control.  Also a fancy rearview camera.  Awesome made me take a picture for prosterity.  I was taking the picture anyway, I didn't need him to tell me!




Here it is (and look, its CHAMPAGNE color!)



In a less fun part of the day, I got to drive Shelia back to his house.  I got to follow the nice, fancy new car, in the old, smoking truck.  A truck that was super angry already about being replaced.  Also a truck that is about 7 feet longer than my car, akin to driving a tank.  I'm just glad I didn't hit anything on the way. 




Betsy called me while we were waiting to sign the papers and when I told her what I was doing, she asked what kind of car he was buying.  I didn't even have to think.  A Chevy Equinox.  And she said, "I'm so proud of you for knowing what kind of car it was!"  I was proud too!

We celebrated by meeting our friends Will, Katy, Laura Beth and John Mark (we like friends with 4 letter names or double names) for Mexican food.  It was a good Friday!

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