# 90 Fitting in and all that jazz...

So I've been in the Delta for a few weeks now (it doesn't seem like that long since I was here, but then went home for a long while and then came back, but its really been 3 total weeks since I moved), and, with the exception of the aforementioned neighbor, I've met some really nice, wonderful people. And I've had a great time exploring some of the small towns and learning about them, and I have plans to do a whole lot more exploring sometime soon. I do believe I'm really going to like it here-- I've enjoyed my job, thus far, and I've had time to do some cooking, some exercising, and some reading. I'm caught up on my NCIS reruns, and Parker seems to be liking it as well. I've even been to a bunko group and made plans to catch up with some old friends (friends from my past, not that they are necessarily old!!)

But I'm harboring a terrible secret. Its awful. Its embarrassing. It makes me feel like a fraud. I get up every morning, and take Parker outside, and I can feel the stares coming at me from all directions (except of course, from the direction of Mr. Professor-- its not a stare I feel in my direction, its a glare). I go to the grocery store, and I feel like there, between the squash and the carrots, I'm going to be found out. I take walks to Fireman's Park or on the walking track downtown and I'm scared to make eye contact with my fellow walkers. Its something that haunts me. The only place I feel safe is alone, in my house, with the door shut. But, its my home that would ultimately betray me, if anyone ever ventured past the front door.

Here's my secret.

I don't collect pottery.

I don't even own any of the pottery.

Not McCarty's.

Not Peter's.

Not anyone's.

Its a fact that I'm pretty sure will get my kicked out of the Delta in a heartbeat, if I was ever found out. I don't know what's wrong with me. I guess I had a tough childhood or something. My parent's forgot to hug me as a child. Whatever the reason. I don't own any pottery. Its something I'm pretty sure I will be forced to rectify soon, if I plan to stay in this area long.

I went to a friend house the other day and I saw many beautiful pieces of pottery displayed in her home. I've seen pieces in different shops I've perused. Heck, we even had some in stores in Laurel. So its not like I don't know better. In Junior Auxiliary, we almost always used it as serving pieces for different get-togethers and socials. There are plenty of good people in Jones County who have pottery pieces. Just not me. I'm sure if they knew, I would have never gotten into LJA in the first place.

So, avid readers, I'm asking for your forgiveness. And your help. I want to be a good person. I really do. I don't want to be found out as a fraud. I think the pieces are quite lovely, and, as someone who fancies themselves a "ceramicist", I know the pottery is beautifully made (which is much harder to do that it looks. Just ask me!). Now, right now, I don't have much money, what with having just started this new job and all, so I don't think I'll be able to buy any pottery anytime soon. But I've checked out some websites and found a few pieces I really like, and I'm graciously posting them on here, as suggestions for any avid readers who might want to buy me a housewarming/new job/welcome to the Delta/belated birthday/love your blog gift.

These first two are McCarty pottery. I know there are different factions who argue between which artist is better, and I'm not going to get into that here-- I don't know the whole story, and I don't know which is better. I do know, however, that it was extremely hard to find any pictures of McCarty's pottery on-line. These first two are the only ones I could find.

I love this color!

These are Peter's pottery.

This says its a casserole dish, so I'm guessing its pretty big-- I love the top of it. It might be my favorite of all the pieces I saw.

# 89 Exploring the Delta with Deb...

This weekend, my sweet mom came to visit and we had a great time! Friday night we met in Leland, where we ate dinner at Lillos, which is right off Highway 61. Earlier that day, I'd driven through Leland on the way to Greenville with Anne Marie for work, and she said Lillos was a good place to eat, so I decided it would be perfect to meet mom there. It was super good! Italian food-- the fried ravioli was fabulous and their salad dressing is good enough to drink!

Saturday we did a bit of shopping, a bit of eating and a lot of exploring. I really wanted to show her Clarksdale, the town where I would be working, so we drove over there late yesterday afternoon. Anne Marie had shown me a Jewish cemetery in the area, so we wanted to check it out. We drove slowly through the parking lot, looking at the names and tombstones, when this guy, about my age, who was walking by, stopped and asked us if there was a Jewish community around the area. Turns out his name was Peleg (or something like that) and he was from Israel, but was traveling, for three weeks, in America. He'd been in Clarksdale a couple days, and specifically picked Clarksdale because of the history of the blues there. So we got to talking to him and he was interesting and kinda unusual. I mean, its not everyday you meet an Israeli in the middle of the Mississippi Delta!

Here are some pictures of the afternoon:

This is mom talking to Peleg (she kept referring to him as Pegleg

This was on one of the larger monumental tombstones-- isn't it really pretty?

I just love the beads on here-- you could tell they were beautiful and expensive and colorful necklaces, and there was a small pin with an owl on it. It makes me wonder who was buried there and who put that beautiful, and rather haunting, tribute to them.

I asked Peleg to translate this particular grave marker for us, since many of them were in Hebrew. He said that David Abrams was generous of spirit, loving friend, kind and "naive but in a good way"-- he said there wasn't really a good translation for that last description.

Many of the tombstones had small rocks and stones on top of them. I remembered this from my short-lived participation in the Newton Roxy Theater's production of The Cemetery Club back when I was teaching! According to my research then (and the refreshing of my memory now!), the stones are left there as a symbolic monument to the deceased. It is an ultimate act of kindness and respect to bury someone and place a marker on the site. A person can only be buried once-- however, each person who comes by can continue to erect a monument or marker on the grave, which they do in a symbolic way by placing the stones.

The entire experience was really neat-- it was a beautiful place. My pictures don't do it justice-- still cannot find my camera. And Peleg was super nice. He came over before he left and asked me how to get to Greenwood, because he had a car and was planning to drive there that afternoon. Since I don't know the area, I wasn't able to help him much. In fact, we were mostly useless to most of his questions about the Jewish people in the community, etc. Mom fussed at me for not talking to him more, suggesting he was "flirting" with me when he was asking for directions. I don't know what else she wanted me to do-- I mean, I got out a freaking map. Of course, she knows I don't have the "flirting" gene that most of the other women in my family have. I have no ability to flirt whatsoever. And i guess I missed my opportunity to flirt with an Israeli in the Delta. Too bad, I'm pretty sure that was on my bucket list somewhere.

# 88 Public Enemy # 1

It was bound to happen. Everyone who knows me knows how many enemies I have. Stacks of them. Most people generally hate me. But people generally like Parker, so it evens out. Well, not anymore. Parker and I officially have out first enemy here in Cleveland.

When I moved in to this house, my landlady, Debbie, told me all about my next-door neighbor, who was a retired professor from Delta State and she said when she lived in the house, she spent many a night, sitting on his porch, talking with him-- that he was interesting, and well-read and collected art and was a great neighbor. She also said he liked dogs, which was good since she had two dogs while she lived here.

Now, obviously, I've not met a whole lot of people here yet (though I'm lucky that the ones I have meet have been super nice and super friendly!), but I was really looking forward to meeting this guy. I had dreams of discussing politics and Faulkner over plates of brownies I'd baked (yeah, that should have been a warning right there! I don't bake!) and he'd be a great neighbor and he'd think I was a great neighbor. As part of my hopes and dreams, I'd been noticing whenever he was outside and I'd try to walk slowly to my car or to the door, so that we'd have a chance to speak. He's never spoken, or even waved at me thus far, but I have enough faith in my general charmingness that I just knew, if he met me, we'd be great neighbors. Debbie even said, more than once, that she thought he'd really like me.

Well, he doesn't.

This afternoon, after I got home from work (my first official day! Yay!), I let Parker out in the backyard, where she did both "jobs". I changed clothes and grabbed my ipod and we headed out to walk to the park since she'd been cooped up inside all day. We walk outside, and I stop, while standing in my yard, on the sidewalk, to untangle my ipod cord, and I then realize, too late, that Parker has stopped in his yard, and is going to the bathroom. No. 2. She does it in just a second, which is unusual-- typically, she walks around sniffing for a while and I can tell she is about to do it, so I can drag her somewhere else if its a bad place. Well, this happened so quickly, I had no time to react, and I tried to pull her, but she'd already done it. It was over in like 10 seconds. So fast.

But apparently, not fast enough to get past Mr. Professor. Yep, before she was even done, and while I was both fussing at her and dragging her through the yard, while she was still half-bent over, he yanks open the door and steps outside onto the porch, in a t-shirt and boxers and yells at me "Don't ever let that dog into my yard again. I better not see him again."

I'm mortified and immediately feel my chest get tight and I get nervous and I say, "Oh, I am so so very sorry, I'm so sorry, it happened so quickly and I'm so sorry, it won't happen again", and before I can even finish this sentence, he screams "You should be keeping him on the sidewalk-- you can drag him on the leash, but don't ever let him in my yard again." He then slams the door.

It was awful. I was sick to my stomach. I was nearly in tears. I mean, I'm sure that its not nice to have random dogs going to the bathroom in your yard, but there are a lot of dogs in this area and I've seen them walking, with their owners, obviously (!), up and down this street all the time. Plus, I saw another, larger area of you-know-what, not far from where Parker had been. Further, she had just gone to the bathroom, and therefore, I didn't really expect her to go again within 5 minutes, so I wasn't paying attention. And, Parker has never been in his yard-- not once, I don't believe, since we got here-- going to the bathroom or even sniffing around. I've purposely kept her out of his yard, just to be polite.

Anyway, the whole situation was awful and everyone knows how badly I hate for people to not like me, so this is a huge test of my new "happy life" wherein I don't worry about stuff like that. I'm failing this test, cause I'm really upset about the whole thing. I was nearly in tears my entire walk, and I cut the walk short so that we could walk back past his house and I could keep Parker on the sidewalk and he would see that I "take directions well".

Once we got back home, I went over there with a baggie and picked it up. I also picked up the other dog stuff that wasn't my dogs. See, aren't I a really nice neighbor? I'm super sad about the whole thing.

# 87 Cooking up a storm...

Today has been an excellent day! I didn't work, of course, but I did get confirmation that I'll be working tomorrow, so that's a relief. I cleaned up a lot, organized my closet and extra room, took a walk around the walking trail downtown, and went to the grocery store.

My friend Katherine, over at "Its a Great Life if You Don't Weaken" posted an interesting recipe earlier this week and I was inspired and decided to try it myself tonight. Its Chicken with Peanut Curry Sauce. Katherine is a fantastic cook and likes to just make recipes up and tweak them to her liking, so borrowing her recipes is usually a really good and yummy idea!

Plus since I don't really have anything in my fridge or cupboard, its good for me to go buy everything I need so that I can get stocked up again! I had a little trouble finding "coconut milk" but told myself that plain milk would be ok. I think it was just fine! The recipe turned out really good! I feel really grown-up and adult with my own house and going to the grocery store and making a really yummy dinner. In order to combat that adult feeling, I'm now watching America's Next Top Model.

Here are some pictures of Katherine's recipe! I always want to eat a really good meal on Wednesday nights because its Top Chef night and I usually get super hungry watching all their cooking!!

Cooking the onions and the curry-- which smelled really wonderful! On cooking shows, you know, they always talk about how great the stuff they are cooking smells and how it permeates through the house and blah blah blah. But this really did smell good! It made me feel like I was a really good cook, when in reality I'd only put the onions in a pan with some curry at that point.

The finished product-- look at how nice it looks with the green bowl and plate. Now, if this were Top Chef, Tom Colichio would be fussing at how its all one color and I should have done a better job of presentation. Well, Tom can suck it. I think it was a fabulous meal!

And thanks to Katherine for the recipe-- she has graciously allowed me to post it here for you guys as well!!

3 chicken breasts cut into cubes
1 medium onion cut in half and then into thin slices
1 medium red bell pepper cut into thin slices
2 teaspoons chopped garlic
3 or 4 medium carrots grated
1 tablespoon curry powder
2 Teaspoons powdered ginger (a little fresh ginger would be even better)
2 Tablespoons tomato paste
4 tablespoons peanut butter
3/4 cup chicken broth
3/4 cup coconut milk
salt and siracha or red pepper to taste
a couple of squeezes of lime juice if you have it
chopped fresh herbs...I used basil (because that's all I had) but green onions and cilantro would be awesome

Heat a little olive oil over medium high heat. Add onions and curry powder and cook for 2-3 minutes until onions start to soften and curry becomes really fragrant. Add chicken and cook for about a minute to brown slightly. Add bell pepper and garlic and cook for about 3-4 more minutes until peppers begin to soften. Add chicken broth and stir to deglaze pan then add tomato paste and stir to blend. Add coconut milk, peanut butter, ginger and carrots and reduce heat to medium low. Simmer for about 5 minutes, stirring frequently. If sauce becomes too thick, add a little chicken broth to thin it out. Add salt, pepper, lime and herbs to taste. Voila!

Katherine wants me to point out that the measurements are more approximate and should be regarded as such-- both she and I tend to cook without measurements, and just "eyeball" it, so you might be a bit more careful than us. Also, I only used one chicken breast and thus had a lot of sauce for just a bit of meat, but it turned out fine. It think next time, some rice or Thai noodles, would be good too! As stated above, I used milk instead of coconut milk and I also deleted the peppers from the recipe since I think bell peppers are gross.

# 86 Ten Great Things About Today... So Far...

I read a really great quote last night (on the internet, so you know its totally true)--

What You Think About Expands.

And I do think its true. I've been surrounded by all sorts of negativity here recently, and most of it I've brought on myself. I'm sure all of you avid readers know some, if not all, of the stuff that's been going on in my life lately, but you might not know that I tend to obsess. Majorly. About everything-- how I should have done this, didn't do that, need to think this, could have said that-- how I should stop thinking about what I should have done, how I messed up a situation, forgot someone's birthday, what a terrible attorney I am, didn't call my friend back when I should have, why am I depressed, what should I be doing with my life, about why I got myself into some of these situations in the first place and does it make me a bad person that I've let people treat me kinda crappy (I mean, aren't all these questions annoying? I'm annoying myself with them, so I'm SURE you readers are annoyed! If you want to avoid my self-introspection, skip down!!)?

Anyway, all these things swirl in my mind, and for the last 8 months or so, I've taken a mental break from doing anything except thinking all these negative thoughts. Thoughts I didn't even realize were negative until more recently. So I've changed some of these things in my life-- work, location, etc., but some are harder to change. And its not been a great thing that the last month or so, and especially these last two weeks, I've basically had NOTHING to think about except all my thinking-about-things-issues! I can see how my negative and wacky thinking about everything little detail has expanded in my mind and into my life. And it ain't pretty, folks!

So, I'm going to adopt this new mantra of "What You Think About Expands" and start focusing on all the positive in my new life up here in Cleveland! I'm including some pictures but I've not found my camera since I went home last week, so that's a bit of a speed bump.

1. A new book I'm reading-- These High, Green Hills by Jan Karon. Its one of the Father Tim/Mitford series-- I read several of these a few years ago, and I like them-- they are simple, easy, uplifting books. I tend to think books like these are more like "junk food" books and that I should be spending my time reading books that are "good for you" like books about curing cancer or the philosophy of Ghandi, etc. But, I'm over that. I'm 25 years old, dangit, and if I want to read a silly novel, I can. At least it doesn't have Fabio on the front.

2. Joining the Bolivar County Library yesterday-- I got a cool keychain card and checked out two books--

and (this one is for Katherine!)

3. The fact that I literally have 19 dog toys strewn about my living room. Parker has taken every single toy out of her basket, and once she gets one out, she walks away and get another one. Plus, she's found my bedroom slippers and two (different) socks that are also on the floor. Despite the fact that I've tried to clean this up already and she just gets the toys and socks back out, I love it. It makes me happy to have her-- toys and all. God knew exactly what he was doing a couple years ago when she came into my life. He knew that one day, I'd be living in Cleveland, a bit down on myself, and I'd need Parker and all her toys to be all over my house to make me laugh. She's currently curled up on top of the pillow beside me on the couch-- moving toys all around makes a girl tired!

4. Leftover tomato basil soup from Newks-- I love leftovers. I love them. It makes me happy to cook only if there are enough leftovers for the next day. I love getting Chinese takeout so I can warm it up the next day and mix it all together for a fantastic meal! This soup is leftover from Sunday night with mom and dad in Oxford, and its just as good today!

5. That I got to see some of my friends this past weekend in Memphis-- Katherine, Courtney and David-- we had a great time! Plus, I got to see Elizabeth Hoffman, a friend from law school, and its been a super long time. She gave me a shout-out on facebook today and it made me laugh. She has a really funny blog-- check it out here.

6. I left this morning to get breakfast, and as I came back, there was a man spraying weedkiller stuff on my yard. He was cutting my yard as well. I was a bit confused. Turns out, it was my landlady's husband, Roger, and he will be cutting my yard every so often. He's super nice and he quoted me a really great price that was $5.00 less than I'd previously been told, so I kept my mouth shut! Its nice not to have to worry about the yard, and since I have a pretty nice yard, I'm glad someone else will be worrying about it.

7. My house is looking pretty fabulous, if I do say so myself. If I ever find my camera, I will take pictures. I've got a few things on my wishlist (I'll blog about that another time-- I'm sure some of you never got me a gift for my birthday/new job/housewarming/generally being a great person/etc. and are wondering what to buy).

8. I've decided to get dinner from Hey Joe's-- my favorite place to eat in town. They have fabulous hummus.

9. I've got a super cute outfit planned for tomorrow because...

10. I passed my drug test! So I'm starting tomorrow! I will be heading to Indianola, Ms, for my first "official" day. To save gas money (since I have no money!), I'm riding with Anne Marie, the girl who will be training me and also lives in Cleveland. I'm super excited. I'm also a bit relieved!

# 85 Parker's Park

After I finished my cupcake reward from my half-day of pseudo-work, Parker and I took a walk. It was beautiful weather and on the other side of the block is a nice little park with baseball fields and tennis courts and walking trails and a playground. So we headed out for a walk. Unfortunately, if you've ever walked with and/or near Parker, you will know that she has to stop literally every 4 feet and smell something. Even if its something she's smelled a dozen times prior on a street she's walked down 100 times prior. So, we started out slow. Very slow. Which gave me time to untangle my ipod cord.

We headed over to the park which was apparently THE place to be for children ages 4-10 who are interested in sports and their parents-- there were at least 6 games of t-ball, baseball, softball, etc., going on, and as we were walking away, a small car pulled up and, no lie, 9 kids got out of the vehicle and one adult. Parker was a hit-- she always is-- and lots of the kids came up to pet her. One in particular tried really hard to pet her but she kept trying to run away-- I'm not sure why- he was wearing Ole Miss pants, so presumably, he was a nice kid.

Perhaps the most interesting part of the walk, which lasted only about 30 minutes, was the pace. We literally stopped dozens of times. Mostly because Parker had to use the bathroom every five minutes. I actually counted-- she went to the bathroom 13 times. I mean, there towards the end, it was just a drop or two. She's just so stubborn though. I was really annoyed-- I mean, is it necessary to mark your territory that many times? Now we are snuggled up on the couch, about to watch NCIS!!

# 84 Unofficial First Days and Starting Over...

So I'm officially living in Cleveland. Full-time. No plans to leave. A bit scared. Sorta excited. I moved week before last but then went home to Laurel for a while and then onto Memphis and Oxford. So, I've not really been here that long till now! I've spent most of my time unpacking boxes, hanging pictures, re-arranging furniture, lamenting on the massive number of trash bags full of clothes I have, reading, fixing my internet connection and just generally enjoying my time off. When I was home last week, I brought back lots of stuff that I'd left in Laurel. I was able to bring back Parker's toys, which I'd forgotten (I'm a bad mother), and Parker has shown how excited she was by pulling each toy out of the basket and bringing it to another part of the room, and then walking away, returning to the basket and getting another toy. She's emptied the entire basket twice. I've decide she has way too many toys.

So I'm sure many of you readers are wondering when, or, more precisely, IF, I will ever start my job. Yes, I'm wondering as well. I got the call last week that I could start immediately, on Friday. Yay! But, then, I got another call saying I had to take a pre-employment drug test before starting. So, Friday morning, I headed over to take the drug test. And while I wasn't really worried about failing the TEST, I was a bit concerned with all the procedures that go along with the test. I had to show my license three different times, but to only two different people. Then I had to empty my pockets and lift up my pants legs to mid-calf. I had to remove the cardigan I was wearing over my t-shirt and place all my things (wallet, cell, cardigan, etc.) into a large drawer that the nurse then locked. I then had to wash my hands with water, no soap, and then go fill up the cup, to the line, but I couldn't flush. I was so stressed out by this time, but I think I passed. I was told the test would take up to a week for the results to be returned to DHS. Later that day my boss told me not to worry about coming in Monday since the results wouldn't be in, but to plan on Tuesday, which would work out fine since there would be court in Clarksdale.

Unfortunately, Monday afternoon I got the call that Tuesday was a no-go as well. Now I'm beginning to get a complex about this. Beginning to worry that this is all some sick joke! But Anne Marie, the girl who will be training me, called and suggested I go to Clarksdale anyway, unofficially (and unpaid!) to watch the hearings and see how things were done. Since I'm super bored, I took her up on the offer and headed there today. I worked super hard so I rewarded myself with a cupcake from Crave. Its the first time I've been there when they actually had a cupcake I wanted to try. I'm not interested in flavors other than chocolate or vanilla, which apparently sell out super fast!!

Its really hard work when you have to work from 9:00 a.m. till nearly 3:00 p.m. I'm a tired girl!!!